I have been in quite a lot of stressed these few days at work... and I felt that I'm stucked at the situation where a lot of "communication" is required, yet I have analysed every possible steps/ways but I still could not foresee any "win-win" case to solve the issues...
I always fix her mistakes quietly instead of pointing those mistakes or wrong doing out to let her acknowledge her own mistakes and to give her room of improvements... She is spoilt because of me... and nobody will find out about how incapable she is... I don't think it would do me any good if I told my new manager the honest truth because he would probably think I am just trying to say bad words about her to protect my own job...
YES, my manager thought of changing my job role just because he thinks that I have to battle with cancer and I may bring the team down if I were to take more days off in the future... In a way I understand his point of view, yet I do not think that arrangement works... He wanted me to train her up so that she could take over my role... and I know very well that she's incapable of taking up this role because of her laziness and poor organizational skills...
Now, if that really happens, I would think I'd be in the situation where... If I were to train her up, and if she couldn't pick things up (cos she isn't that smart really), they all may think it's ME who didn't teach her well probably because I wanted her to fail as I wasn't willing to hand her the role (especially IF I told my new manager now, that she isn't quite right for this role?)...
It's complicated... and I haven't slept well the past few days... and it sort of created a bit of "tension" between her and myself these few days...
Well, the other morning she took a correspondence away from my desk and told me she's going to follow up with that (because she is "prepared" to learn and take on my role)... I wasn't impressed because she doesn't keep things in file and keep records of what she does and if ONE DAY someone asks me about what's going on with that job, I will have no records of it and I will look terrible... IF this was her tasks to take care of these correspondence, I couldn't care less... but these are MY responsibility and she should have known she shouldn't have crossed it especially I am back to WORK now... it's not like I'm still in the hospital...
So I questioned her if she has finished her own stuffs and if she is now up to date with her filings/photocopying and etc (because she has been crying the previous day complaining to everyone that she's so stressed and overloaded with things that she has so many things to apply and to follow up)... If she already has so many things to do and follow up, how could she NOT trying to finish her own shit first? ...Is she a bit too eager and impatience or is she trying to proof something there? ...
I was quite annoyed and she was also offended by the way I questioned her... She knew she has crossed it and she just wasn't happy that for the first time I questioned her in this kinda way I guess... We haven't really spoken for 2 days... Let's hope after the weekend things would improve...
Complicated... but it certainly has given me a chance to think about the whole situations, the reality of this world, human behavior, my true feelings and thoughts, to re-evaluate and reflect my own actions and to check if I am actually being fair or naive and etc... Anyway, I am sure I'll find my way to deal with it... Life is all about learning how to deal with problems, isn't it?
I always fix her mistakes quietly instead of pointing those mistakes or wrong doing out to let her acknowledge her own mistakes and to give her room of improvements... She is spoilt because of me... and nobody will find out about how incapable she is... I don't think it would do me any good if I told my new manager the honest truth because he would probably think I am just trying to say bad words about her to protect my own job...
YES, my manager thought of changing my job role just because he thinks that I have to battle with cancer and I may bring the team down if I were to take more days off in the future... In a way I understand his point of view, yet I do not think that arrangement works... He wanted me to train her up so that she could take over my role... and I know very well that she's incapable of taking up this role because of her laziness and poor organizational skills...
Now, if that really happens, I would think I'd be in the situation where... If I were to train her up, and if she couldn't pick things up (cos she isn't that smart really), they all may think it's ME who didn't teach her well probably because I wanted her to fail as I wasn't willing to hand her the role (especially IF I told my new manager now, that she isn't quite right for this role?)...
It's complicated... and I haven't slept well the past few days... and it sort of created a bit of "tension" between her and myself these few days...
Well, the other morning she took a correspondence away from my desk and told me she's going to follow up with that (because she is "prepared" to learn and take on my role)... I wasn't impressed because she doesn't keep things in file and keep records of what she does and if ONE DAY someone asks me about what's going on with that job, I will have no records of it and I will look terrible... IF this was her tasks to take care of these correspondence, I couldn't care less... but these are MY responsibility and she should have known she shouldn't have crossed it especially I am back to WORK now... it's not like I'm still in the hospital...
So I questioned her if she has finished her own stuffs and if she is now up to date with her filings/photocopying and etc (because she has been crying the previous day complaining to everyone that she's so stressed and overloaded with things that she has so many things to apply and to follow up)... If she already has so many things to do and follow up, how could she NOT trying to finish her own shit first? ...Is she a bit too eager and impatience or is she trying to proof something there? ...
I was quite annoyed and she was also offended by the way I questioned her... She knew she has crossed it and she just wasn't happy that for the first time I questioned her in this kinda way I guess... We haven't really spoken for 2 days... Let's hope after the weekend things would improve...
Complicated... but it certainly has given me a chance to think about the whole situations, the reality of this world, human behavior, my true feelings and thoughts, to re-evaluate and reflect my own actions and to check if I am actually being fair or naive and etc... Anyway, I am sure I'll find my way to deal with it... Life is all about learning how to deal with problems, isn't it?
3 comments:
i'm sure u do a lot of good things but one of the weakness as i see is not telling the person their mistakes (do it professionally!).. covering up for them will only make matters worse.. for all parties..
telling mgr the truth won't "make you look bad" because that is the real situation but u shd prolly try and admit to mgr that you have been covering up for her without anyone's knowledge and that was something you shouldn't have done..
I do admit that I have spoilt her because of that... but I always thought she "knew" I'm helping her and I always hoped that she would "get the message" and start to LIFT her game because someone "noticed" her mistakes already!! ... but I guess she just took it for granted and didn't wanna improve because she knew I wouldnt "report" her to anyone anyway... =/
Still thinking if I should talk to managers... The thing is I do not think there'll be any "improvements" even if I told managers because they are the "soft" type...
:) well regardless of what you did or didn't do in the past.. the fact is right now the attitude problem is unhealthy to you and the team, the organisation.. so this has to be addressed.. don't worry.. you'll know what to do!!
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